2013年12月3日星期二

reblogged: Empty Nest Marriage syndrome Coping Tips -- Things the Two of You Need to Do

original: http://marriage.about.com/cs/midlife/a/emptynest_4.htm

By Sheri & Bob Stritof

There are many things the two of you can do to prevent the empty nest syndrome from hurting your marriage.
  • Seek counseling if your empty nest marriage is showing signs of withdrawal, alienation, and negativity.
  • Accept that you will experience grief and that it hits men just as hard as it hits women. Empty nest dads may feel a sense of regret over things they didn't do and time not spent with their children.
  • Limit how often you call your kids.
  • Don't place guilt trips on your kids. This is especially important during the holidays.
  • Keep lists of each kids' favorite foods for when they visit or when you put together a care package to send out.
  • Develop a flexible mindset and be open to change.
  • Work on becoming friends with your adult children.
  • Don't rush into volunteer roles, travel, taking classes, moving, or emptying out a kid's room. You have plenty of time.
  • Schedule dates with each other.
  • Make a list of things you have never done but would like to do.
  • Make some short-term and long-term plans on how you will spend your money and time.
  • If you are thinking about downsizing, see if you can declutter and simplify your life without moving.
  • Before making a move to a new location, make sure you have truly double checked your tax situation, and tax benefits from selling and buying, along with analyzing maintenance and utility costs in the new location.
  • Don't make assumptions about what your spouse is thinking or wanting to do.

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